Maybe Someday

20180427_172452A sense of familiarity surrounded me as I turned around the corner, coming face to face with my childhood. The childhood that I have no recollection of. The memories I do have rely heavily on the stories told by my family, if you could even call them that. My mother left nine years ago and my father was never home enough to even be considered a father. My sister saved herself as soon as she turned eighteen and fled our family, and my brother is the reason I decided to return to the place of my nightmares. The brother I found out about exactly fifteen hours ago. I made the choice to come here in the heat of the moment but I can still feel the indecision and worry beating in my heart, slowly making its way to the rest of me. My throat started to close up and my eyes watered. My mind tried reinforcing the wall that had kept all the feelings from the past day locked up, but it failed miserably and fear, anger, and sadness consumed me. I backed away from the cause of my panic attack and ran as fast as I could to my haven, the only good and lasting memory I had of this place. I couldn’t get away from the long road fast enough. I slid down the tree in my hideout, squeezing my eyes shut. Maybe someday I’ll face the memories and truths of my shattered past.


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